Sunday, December 18, 2016

Women Who Hold Their Own Are Fine Role Models

             Women Who Hold Their Own Are Fine Role Models

                   Published in Marietta Daily Journal December 18, 2016

            Woman without her man is lost.
            Punctuate the sentence above to fit your own, uh, perceptions.  In the interest of harmony, husbands and wives should neither work together on this nor share their answers.
In my immediate family, I’ve had lots of women in my life: my mother, ten sisters, six sisters-in-law, one wife, two daughters, six granddaughters, and two daughters-in-law.  Add several scores of female colleagues in the teaching profession.  If I don’t know very much about women, I should.
  One thing I do know is that nobody should fear the “feminization” of education just because women outnumber men in public schools.  The women with whom I’ve taught, though quite feminine, have not been weak.  In fact, I’ve seen the most petite of women put the toughest of 17-year-old boys in their place, with words of course, and those effective, pointing fingers.
            More than once I’ve paused or slowed down my walk in the hall because I saw a female teacher dealing with a tall, strapping boy at the door of her classroom.  Thinking she might need a man around, I would approach gently, only to discover that I was superfluous.  Believe it, female teachers can be tough and are not to be pitied.
            If I’m already sounding sexist, I just don’t care.  If I believe a lady is in need, I’m going to run to her, no matter what changes are going on in today’s crazy world regarding gender and gender reference.  Any man who wouldn’t, well …
            Actually, I’m glad there are so many women in education.  The guys need them.  They need them so that they can learn about women.  And girls need male teachers so that they can learn about men.  I know, I know.  This train of thought goes against the utterly senseless gender neutrality squawk that we’re all supposed to be swallowing.  We’re no longer male and female, you know.  We are the world; we are the people.  No differences, please.  Differences would make us unequal.
            It’s been fun all these decades watching male coaches interact with high school girls.  I love coaches.  Parents of non-athletes may not realize what an important part coaches play in the development of their youths.  Most coaches also teach academic courses, so they influence more than just their athletes.  Usually they are well known by the entire student body, head coaches and assistants both.
            Speaking of almost 100% of the male coaches I’ve taught with, I can say that they are an indispensable part of the development of young people whom they teach or coach.  Coaches are a symbol of masculinity (pardon another ugly sexist word).  Coaches are typically fun and are good teachers.  Taking their coaching skills into the classroom, they know how to demonstrate, not just tell.  What I’ve most admired them for, however, is their modeling for the guys how to view and treat the girls.
            My ten sisters have shaped my life as much as anyone I know.  Mentally I clump them according to age.  Ida, Jewel, and Authula are the oldest.  Children of the 1920’s, they have always epitomized beauty and character.  Margueritte and Minnie are ‘30’s girls, although Margueritte was born in 1928.  Almedia, Ruby, and Janelle were born in the ‘30’s but came of age in the ‘40’s.  Carolyn and Tressie are ‘50’s girls, the first to grow up in America’s new youth culture.  They survived and thrived.
            I have long wished that every friend I have could meet these intelligent, interesting women.  Their birthdays range from 1922 to 1942.  They all have the same parents whom they have honored all of their lives. Their love and respect for each other is endless.  They have raised their children well.  Quiet strength is their forte, humility their path, laughter their constant companion.  Cotton fields never marred their beauty.  Life’s struggles never diminished their faith.  I wish I were their equal.
            My mind always goes to these sisters and to my six brothers every time I read or hear about the fuss over gender.  Even Princeton University joined the foolishness last fall, imploring their students not to speak or write in “gender-based” words so as not to show disrespect of others who are “transgender, gender queer, or gender nonconforming.”
            Gender nonconforming?  Since when have we had a choice?  Look, my sisters are outstanding W-O-M-E-N. That’s females.  And my brothers are exemplary M-E-N; males, that is.  The joy of my life has been to be a little brother to all of them, except my kid brother who is “the baby.”  I’m not his equal either.

Roger Hines

12/14/16

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